The Bravest Families in America

So, I don't fully intend on this blog being entirely about military life and being a military spouse and all that but, I watched Oprah the other day. The show was "The Bravest Families in America" which was a show about military families of soldiers who are or have been deployed to the Iraq or Afghanistan war. Oprah said she could not name anyone serving in the war. Tom Brokaw was on and said "Less than 1% of the American people are carrying the burdens of this war. Soldiers leave behind their families for extended deployments, two and three tours at a time (try four Tom), and they're left with anxiety and depression, kids who are uncertain about their parents, and nothing else is asked of the rest of us. That's not just unjust, in a way it's immoral." ( I may have paraphrased a bit.) First of all...well said Tom Brokaw. I'm glad somebody said it. When my husband first deployed I didn't want any acknowledgement, I still really don't. Everyone was super supportive in the beginning it seemed and now that we ( us personally) are 7 years in with 3 (about to be 4) tours just to Iraq alone it is no big deal anymore. When you live in a military area the empathy is even less. There are thousands of husbands and wives doing what you're doing and children who are as well. It's become somewhat of a subject of ambivalence for me. I'm tired! I really do not want anyone to feel sorry for me, I'm not a special case but it does seem that our way of life is unacknowledged anymore. I was explaining to my best friend back home how much of my life I have had to maintain over the phone. Primarily my marriage. Do you know how hard it is to be romantic on webcam? I said romantic not sexual :) Anyway, when it comes down to it, it doesn't matter. My husband has come home safe 3 times now (and soon to be 4!). I am truly grateful every day for that, and if the rest of the world doesn't care....it doesn't matter does it...? Oh and Oprah...you really should get to know some soldiers....

A Defining Label

Urban dictionary defines Household Six as this: military man's stay-at-home wife. Sometimes keeps up with the arduous tasks of shining boots, picking up laundry, and shopping, but mostly just a strain on meager Department of Defense budgets, and the military husband. The name is derived from where said wife spends most of her time, and the number 6 is the designation for a commander of a Company/Troop, Battalion/Squadron, Brigade/Regiment, Division or Corps.

So, is this how I define MYSELF you may ask? Well, whether I want to or not, yes. I, Ashley, am so many more things. Mother, daughter, sister, medical assistant, hypochondriac, emotional wreck, survivor....those are some of my labels. However, yes, I suppose it's my most defining. It encapsulates every part of my life and encroaches on every single thing I do. Sometimes, it's like a dark cloud hanging over my head in a black sky. Others, it's like a proud badge I wear, letting everyone know that this is what I do and it's not something just anyone can do and succeed. I have the privilege of knowing others who can and the unfortunate task of encountering the ones who can't and seeing them fall.

So, I've decided to chronicle the events in my life that live up to this label or any other label I may have for that matter. This should be good......